


Baby, Won't You Lock the Door?

by BasementVampire



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Delusions, Hallucinations, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Psychosis, Schizophrenia, frank is a good boyfriend
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-07
Updated: 2017-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-11 22:25:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 879
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12945315
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BasementVampire/pseuds/BasementVampire
Summary: Frank comforts Gerard during a psychotic episode.





	Baby, Won't You Lock the Door?

When Frank found him, Gerard was sitting on the floor in the corner of their bedroom with his knees drawn up to his chest. He was staring off in front of him, eyes teary and breath hitching as he gasped for air.

Frank knelt down next to him, placing a hand gently on Gerard’s cheek. “Gee? Baby?”

Gerard started, breaking out of his trance. Hazy eyes focused on Frank’s, and it broke Frank’s heart to see how sad and scared he was. “It won’t stop,” Gerard whimpered brokenly.

Frank stroked his hair soothingly, trying to calm the other man down even though he was panicking inside, too. “What won’t stop?”

“The voices,” Gerard said.

After being together for two years, Frank still hadn’t gotten used to Gerard’s disorder. He didn’t think he ever really would. Of course, he loved Gerard with all his heart, but there was nevertheless something disconcerting about waking up at two in the morning to your boyfriend screaming about bugs crawling all over him when there’s nothing there, or insisting that a dead girl is watching him sleep.

And of course, there were the voices. Frank didn’t know much about the voices Gerard heard because he didn’t like to talk about them, but Frank knew that they were violent and abrasive, and often threatening. When they got really bad, Gerard would cry or scream or kick things, and it scared Frank. He tried his best to be there for Gerard and help him through it, but he was barely holding himself together as it was.

Frank cradled Gerard’s head in his hands. “What are they saying?” he asked gently.

“Bad things,” Gerard sobbed. He clutched at Frank’s shirt desperately. “Oh, please, Frank. Make it stop.”

“Sh, it’s okay, love.” Frank brushed the other man’s inky hair back gently. “I’m here. It’s okay. Breathe.”

Gerard drew a few shaky breaths, his big, pretty eyes sad and glistening with tears. Frank sat with him as he calmed down; his breathing evened out and he stopped crying, although he still looked distant and unnerved.

“Gerard?” Frank said softly.

He blinked. “I’m here.”

With a small smile, Frank continued to run his fingers through his boyfriend’s hair soothingly. “Are they quiet now?”

“Not completely.” His voice was barely audible.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Gerard was silent for a moment. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I always drag you into this. You don’t deserve this, Frankie.”

Frank cupped the other man’s face in his hands, making sure Gerard looked him in the eye. “Gerard, please don’t apologize. I love you. And it’s a privilege to be the one to help you through this.”

Gerard smiled faintly. “I love you, too.” He leaned forward and kissed Frank softly, the action sweet and chaste. Gerard rested his forehead against his lover’s. He murmured, “I won’t let them hurt you.”

Frank drew back, staring questioningly at the other man. It creeped him the fuck out when Gerard said cryptic things like that. “Won’t let who hurt me?”

Gerard didn’t reply at first. He tried to return to his position in Frank’s arms, but Frank held him back, insistent upon getting an answer. “Gerard. What are you talking about?”

Looking away, Gerard said, “They’re coming for you, Frank.”

“Who is?”

“I’m not allowed to say,” Gerard hissed, eyes darting up. Immediately, he was on the defensive, no longer leaning into Frank’s touch, but instead recoiling, his eyes dark.

The thing Frank hated as much—if not more—than Gerard’s psychotic episodes was the paranoia. Frank couldn’t stand it when his boyfriend got like this—defensive, accusatory, guarded. It made Frank hurt inside like nothing else.

“Okay. Okay, I’m sorry,” Frank backpedaled. “You don’t have to tell me.”

Cautiously, he reached out to grasp Gerard’s hand, relieved when Gerard didn’t pull away.

Again, Gerard refused to meet Frank’s gaze. “Sorry,” he whispered. “I just…I can’t say. But don’t worry; I’ll protect you.”

Frank knew that there was no real danger. Gerard’s persecutory delusions were just that—delusions. But there was no convincing Gerard otherwise, so in these situations, Frank just did his best to calm his boyfriend down and not get him more agitated.

“It’s okay,” he assured, petting Gerard’s hair. “Why don’t we go lie down? I think you’ll feel better after you get some sleep.”

Gerard nodded, letting Frank lead him to their bed and tuck him under the covers. The two lay there quietly for several minutes before Gerard spoke.

“Are you mad at me?”

“Darling, of course not,” Frank said.

“I mean…don’t you wish I wasn’t like this?” Gerard asked despondently.

Frank caressed his lover’s face. It killed him to see Gerard like this—sad and insecure and vulnerable. “I love you exactly the way you are, Gee,” he said sincerely. “I wouldn’t ever want you to change.”

“I love you so much.” His voice was barely a whisper.

Frank held him close, listening as Gerard’s breathing slowed and evened out. Asleep, he looked so peaceful and angelic—nothing like the scared, sobbing mess he had been only minutes before.

Frank had meant what he said. He truly did love Gerard, despite his issues. Their relationship could be exhausting, but Frank wouldn’t trade Gerard for the world.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello friends! Hope you enjoyed.
> 
> Just an aside, I do not have schizophrenia. I tried to stay as realistic and respectful as possible in this piece, but if I have made any errors or if there is anything I should change, please let me know.
> 
> <3


End file.
